"What Happens to Mutual Friends After a Relationship is Over?"

We all know that breaking up is not easy to do, but what happens to the other relationships that form as a result of the romantic relationship you once had. Break ups can not only be hard for the two people involved, but it can also be hard for people who have developed a bond with the people who are breaking up.

In my case it was a whole group of us. Because we went to high school together I knew my ex friends before we even got together and vice versa.  Even the friends that we brought into the relationship, each of us got along with.  We were in a sense, a big family.  After the break up, I didn’t really think about how it had affected them at the time. They did try to be a friend to both of us in the beginning.   It honestly felt like I had kids and now they had to try and spend time with both parents without making the other feel left out or something.

In the end, sides were taken and the friendships I once had with these people are no longer what they used to be.  It makes me question things like if there was something I could have done to keep the friendship going? Were these people even really my friends to begin with? Maybe I just became a friend by association. There are other factors that I know played a part in why things turned out the way they ultimately did in the end.

 It is sad, but sometimes it takes certain situations to really find out who is truly there for you.  Then again, the terms of how a breakup happened can play a factor in how people respond.  No one wants to feel like they have to choose sides and no one wants to hurt anyone (at least I would hope).  My advice: Just try and be there as much as you can for both people if you are a mutual friend.  Each person can take the breakup in a different way, just try and be there for them. I took my breakup differently than my ex. Not to say he didn’t hurt at all, but he had already moved on, while I was still in shock. During this time I didn’t want to have a pity party, I just wanted someone to call, take me out, someone to help refocus myself so I can move on.  I didn’t care that they were friends with my ex; I just didn’t want them to act like we weren’t friends.  I know it’s not easy to be a friend in this situation, but that’s what friends are for, if you are a true one.

How did you deal with two friends going through a breakup?

Was it hard to be a friend to both of them after the breakup?


BY: Ayesha Wallace via EIC Le'Keshia Smith