Paying the bill for some food is not about feminism.



I read a story on my TL about a foul man who took a lady who had taken the time and effort to dress up and show-up on a date. Because nothing horrendous happened to her, she could tell her story humorously. Immediately after reading and RTing, I had a little rant of my own and the ‘if women want equality they must pay 50% of the bill’ bus was right on cue.


The plea for economic equality seems to really rub men up the wrong way. The request for social equality seems to annoy men off each time. The appeal for institutional equality seems to threaten a man’s masculinity so much that something as primitive as a lover’s rendezvous; is dragged into the equality struggle.


This question “So who is the misogynist, the fella who pays the bill / the gent who splits with you?” (the answer is neither) almost had my eyes rolling back so I had to seek assistance from @Nollyodbanks who gracefully explained that “we can’t minimize an issue as big as social and economic equality to who pays the bill at the end of a meal.”


Before we go further, let’s quickly establish that PAYING THE BILL IS NOT ABOUT FEMINISM, EQUALITY OR EVEN MISOGYNY.


For a reason that flies over my head each time, a woman not wanting to be a subordinate, an ‘other’ or third rate human is so threatening to the man that he feels the need to cease his acts of endearment and chivalry if such requests persist.


Yes, many feminists will opt to pay their way even on dates because too often men accrue the cost of a couple plates then expect some form of ‘thank you for the food’ payment in return.


One thing anti-feminists and super sayian 11 feminists have succeeded in doing is pitting women against men, making this struggle for gender equality a war of the sexes. PLEASE LISTEN TO ME NOW, nowhere in the definition of feminist does is say: ‘Hater of those owning a penis’ or ‘Lover of all things female and none male.’ Get rid of all that junk and rethink why you would be anti-women wanting to be recognized as people and not objects for possession. When you realize all we want is for women to be allowed to be women without any marginalisation, defiling or besmirching are we feminists still that bad?


Now, back to things that have nothing to do with feminism, like buying me flowers, paying the bill, opening the damn door for me or even carrying my passed out self to bed; if you do not hold treating your/a lady to small and big delights, at high esteem without flexing your masculinity then feminism didn’t ruin you/this encounter, you’ve been losing.


The bizarrely disproportionately large amount of attention paid to matters as small as paying the bill give an inaccurate representation of what feminists want in a relationship, stand for and also, what they work hard towards in society every day.


There are certain injustices a man has never and perhaps will never experience. There are notions that need to be corrected and ideologies that need to be thought through thoroughly, habits and beliefs that need altering but in the meantime, paying the bill for some food is not about feminism.


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