It’s been playing in my mind, consistently over and over for the last couple of weeks. It’s been something I’ve tried to understand because unfortunately, it wasn’t something I expected. None of what we did was something I expected. But even that has come with a few learning points.
The quest for the truth
I used to believe that lying was always a bad thing; and of late, I’ve had to question how able I am to handle brut honesty. I know that sometimes we request the truth, without being aware that we can’t expect someone to communicate his or her truth how we would communicate ours. Be aware that in requesting someone to be honest with you that you may not like their truth.
When you learn to trust someone explicitly, you learn to put your walls done and allow them to see you at your most naked. When you learn to bare your soul to them, you don’t spend time worrying about whether or not you and your feelings are safe and protected by them. You just feel it.
Change happens whether we like it or not. At some point, it’s not even something that’s intentional. We meet people who naturally bring out the best of us, although it’s strange to many, change will make you happier – if it’s healthy changes.
More than anything, I allowed that to hold me back quite a bit last year, I was brave with things I was certain of and some of the things I was uncertain about, because I knew I have an incredible support system that would walk with me through the sunshine and stormy weather. It’s not the easiest thing to just walk into something without taking note of how it could fail, and successfully, push you to ignore those fears and press forward.
Sometimes, the best thing we can do to protect something – even from those we love, is to keep it to ourselves. My best-kept secret of 2015; is one of the things that I value the most in my life right now. I learnt how to protect it, without everyone knowing what was going on. It’s such a big part of who I am, but sometimes, not everyone needs to understand why exactly you do something the way you choose to do it. You don’t owe anybody an explanation for how you protect the things you value most, especially when you fear losing them (naturally, this is apart from things such as abuse and murder etc.)
Happiness is a choice, you can either fight for all the good things, or you can focus on all the negative things and wonder how things would have worked out if you had just taken a moment to take a chance on the positive. We allow negative situations to control us and weigh more than positive situations.
In the new year, I hope you’ve found it in yourself to protect your heart, but not build walls so high that you allow negativity to take control of your life. We have all been hurt, we’ve all been abandoned by those we thought would never abandon us, but we’ve also experienced joy.
Walk into this year knowing that life is full of unexpected surprises, and even though there may be curveballs ahead, living it to the fullest is the best way to do it, and look back asking “what if”.
Our friendship is my best kept secret. Our friendship is one of my most prized possessions. I thank you for all the lessons, I thank you for being on my team and for calling me out when you felt I was wrong, but I also thank you for being yourself, without holding yourself back.
You can follow me on twitter: @MzLee_
You can follow my personal blog: www.mzlovelee.com